να ξέρετε academy (Getting to Know You)
The Infinite Possibilities in Life and Love

‘Close Encounters’!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There’s not much room for overzealousness when it comes to the pursuit of your enchanted happiness. Familiar with the saying, “walk, don’t run”? This would serve you well if you’re presently contemplating calling her for the 9th time today or stopping by her job unannounced just to say hi and you’ve only been dating for a week and a half!……. A lil breathing room please! Absence is supposed to make the heart grow fonder not cause your new ‘friend’ to apply for a restraining order and get the locks changed.

Red flag #1: You just met and exchanged numbers and they already have you on speed dial!………. HUH?!!

Red flag #2: On your second date they are telling you just how special you are to them. (Anyone got the number for 9-1-1)? 

Red flag #3: They’re exhibiting jealous tendencies within the first week of going out! We’re not even settling into anything official yet and I’m still curious about the ex. WTF?!

Ladies and gents! Welcome to ‘stop f*!#king calling me’ 101. If you’re experiencing this sorta thing, seriously consider a handgun permit or a timeshare in Porta Venezia. These things get ugly quick and unfortunately they have a nasty habit of lingering. Who wants to spend the next 8 months living like you’re being wire-tapped by the F.B.I. and go from shopping at your usual haunts to borrowing your buds car to hit the thrift store? (Cuz honestly, even THEY have the good taste to NEVER go there)…….unless of course they have a fetish for nostalgia. In that case, I see a lot of online shopping in your future!

No DOES mean no and if you’re under the misconception that after being smacked publicly, threatened legally, told clearly, refused aggressively, ignored repeatedly and avoided entirely that you’re still in a relationship,……oh boy!..you’re without a doubt, a stalker!!!

Who the hell decapitated my garden gnomes, by the way??

 

 

  

 

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