να ξέρετε academy (Getting to Know You)
The Infinite Possibilities in Life and Love

Perspective from the Temple of Aphrodite

 

‘Confessions’
 
This was a relatively ‘action-packed’ period in my life…Fondly referred to as my ‘roaring 20’s’, it was a beer-bong guzzling, strip club frequenting, bed-hopping fiesta of more women than I care to even try to remember and less stability than a house of S. Florida ‘casino cards’…
A 20-something, x-beach bum, fresh off the streets of indecent exposure with a lustful appetite, I fed mainly on all night sex parties and the ‘run as fast as you can’ morning after…I was completely out of control and would tell anyone at the time that I was on top of the ‘game’ staring out of a 6th story penthouse window.
From the time I woke up til the time I went to bed, I lived for one undeniable reason…..chicks! I loved em’ incessantly and showed my fondness by sleeping with almost every one of them that batted an eyelash at me. My education comes through experience and though my perspective, thought process and intent with women has changed dramatically, the ‘end-game’ of that education; Pimp Out University, is designed as a confidence builder and knowledge base for my peers to draw from and subsequently attract, appreciate and reciprocate love and understanding with regard to the opposite sex…

 

Let’s take it from the top…

As a single guy,(by choice I might add) I empathize with my fellow compadres regarding the few available women that are actually worth the effort and possible rejection. The journey involved can be an arduous 1…
Sex is overrated with the prospects that didn’t quite cut – it to begin with and after the novelty of seeing them naked wears off, all you have to show for the 2 or 3 dates you subjected your credit card to is those few drunken hours of sweaty, less than amazing, but better than by your dammy, sex.
Getting the opposing sex to, well have sex with you is not the conundrum; the after-copulation expectations are where we generally hit a snag.
She doesn’t want a full-time, clingy, he’s probably a player anyway bf and you’re not certain if your otherworldly charm is what got you in the sack with her this soon or if she’s just another ‘fallen woman’. Either way, so you got some………BIG DEAL! What did you really get? After your subconscience pecks away at you with thoughts on the condom’s durability and the inferiority complex you’re starting to develop because she never called YOU back, it’s the standard return to square 1.
Enjoy the ‘game’ gents, but don’t lower your standards simply because she’s willing and possesses some sort of a ‘thang’…There’s plenty of other, more qualified socialites to adorn your arm with and tomorrow’s another day to look forward to literally ‘knockin’ the sparks out of it’!
Shoot for the stars!!!!!!!

Cutting to the chase…

Aptly titled, this subject is one of major scrutiny. The curtain call for many performers involved and seeks to frustrate the hell out of men…Wait a minute! Ask yourself the question, “Just how easily do you actually want it to be in catching her”? Wouldn’t this take away from some of the challenge and excitement?

Freely admitting defeat during this process is the exact opposite of what you should do. Women need to feel wanted, to the point that we declare our willingness to lace up our running shoes and display our fortitude amid ‘The Chase’.

Chances are that you’ll not only be judged on your tact and etiquette, your approach to this tiny formality will also be under review. Never pretend that you’re not interested or that you’re simply doing this for personal reasons,…this thing is about her.

Be forthcoming and playful. Sincerity will get you everywhere in this part and the need to reaffirm your true intent or feelings need not be regurgitated so often afterward…she’ll already know how you feel.

It’s a necessary function in dating and can propell you straight through to the ‘Courtship’ which by the way, still exists and is a time when reflecting on the adversity that occurred within the latter was no more than a small sacrament.

Enjoy her,…you’ve worked hard for the reward!

Desperately clinging…

In praise of grace and courage to the already scantily clad percentage of ‘hopelessly seeking Susan’ alpha centauries, I admire you, yet consider myself one of the lucky ones. I have willingly embraced the facts that are most evident where dating is concerned.
The epitome of self-structure and re-dedication has become a centerpiece for this blog as well as my website. I can feel the undercurrents of suffrage for so many that I feel compelled to make a stand.
I invite you to express your ideas on the opposite sex, whether man or woman and facilitate each other in mutual understanding seeking respect toward one another….

The Dawn

It is easy to remember the day. It was always the night that concerned me. The bulging conflict between the rising sun and the moon’s twilight delivered such different stories.
Each as beautiful to admire as the other. Dismissing the ironies that preclude the awakening and succede the darkness. I am but an observer. Aware… Watching.
Anticipating some signifigant happening to move or shift time in my favor.
The horizon, so removed from the steel reality that I call home requests an audience. I am willing and subsequently find myself as eager to talk as she.
Barely coherent orchids call to the sky for rain and the settled moisture from the night before simply glistens untasted on the leaves of veteran willow trees. Their swaying, a morning song.
Finally, I look for her. A passing moment. An unverifiable sighting. I know that she was here. I can smell her hair and the wind speaks of her retreat.
Waiting has become my silent companion. My thoughts echoing, their persistence offering little comfort as I press to find that for which I am searching. As my eyes open to the ascending light, the looming despair that has preoccupied me for seemingly a century has dissipated. I recognize her. She has found me. Though exhausted and worn I have strength enough to smile at the Heavens. I have waited so long to see the dawn and it’s captivating presence is without contest…

 

 

‘What Women Want’

Does Average Joe Have A Chance?

 

 

 

 

   This topic is far too broad to narrow down to a single hypothesis. The fact that women typically have many requirements forces me to examine them all and the premise behind them. What women want cannot be summarized in an exclusive declaration of sudden clarity so I offer the theory that women seek a sanctuary of ideals.

   From a very early age, women begin fantasizing about marriage. As they develop and grow older, those ideas begin to blossom and transform. Ideas and thoughts change. Standards progressively become higher and knowledge of self takes precedent over understanding of others. In layman’s terms; an air of entitlement begins to surface and judgments shift. Value systems and morals become more important than immediate gratification for women as they seek a higher calling. That Prince Charming or knight in shining armor fallacy has taken on a physical state and eclipsed any hopes of romance for the ‘average Joe’

   In part, media is to blame for the unrealistic expectations that women have formed. Personifying women as the most beautiful, precious things that life has to offer and to attain her you must meet certain financial and physical requirements. (Quality List components):

  •  Money
  • Career
  • Physique
  • Kind
  • Confident

   These are just a few items I’ll mention for the time being though keep in mind these criteria must be met after the ‘Prince Charming’ test is passed. This is quite a laundry list to deal with for the modern, human man and whether considered fair or unfair, it’s either roll with the punches or be expelled out of the picture and cast into obscurity altogether. I have chosen the former because let’s face it; women are creatures that we love, covet and can’t live without. Our mothers will attest to that.

   The idea that women control the uncontrollable is no longer shunned in society. As they have taken on stronger roles in the world and politics, they have become empowered and men can no longer feel safe and secure at the helm. Thank God that women actually need men for purposes other than delegation or we’d be in serious trouble.

Aside from deeply imbedded emotional issues, women are commonly very fleeting. According to one gentleman, he was suddenly abandoned by a woman he had been dating for 2 months with no apparent reason as to why. He states; “ She tells me that I am different than most guys, and that she sees a potential future for us. She says the intimacy and communication is far greater than anything else she has known. After telling friends and family that I am the ‘one’, she has suddenly disappeared in the last two days.[i] This, after reading this poor gentleman’s dilemma tells me one simple thing. There is no more a chance of standing on equal footing with women in a relationship as men are simply whatever and whenever for the typical idealistic woman. There are no control issues…they possess it. This article is entitled ‘The Switch’ from What Women Want from Men.com The response to his tragic situation was as follows,…’She was sincere when she said that she saw a potential future for you and really did feel close to you. Then for reasons neither you or even possibly she can understand, something triggered inside her that said; “ Don’t go there, it’s dangerous! You’ll regret it! Don’t fall in love. Stick with what’s safe and familiar”…’ To me, this is not advice, it’s just a way of saying, ‘deal with it’, women are entitled to do and act as they please in relationships with no regard for the other person involved. Unfortunately, this has come to fruition and more and more men are being left dangling because of this scenario.

   Moving along, my opinion is that women feel as if they can have whatever they want because in a nutshell, it’s a proven theory. They can, and America has enabled them to the point of creating holidays for them to celebrate our ‘luck’ in having been allowed to make their acquaintance.

   As an avid fan of women, I am the first in line for those Valentine’s Day bouquets or Sweetest Day Hallmark Moments cards, but I can truly say that the state of affairs has come down to one defining thing for what women truly desire in the men they seek in relationships; ‘The Variable’! This term I am affixing to the idea that what may lead a woman to you may be the exact thing she will want to change as she gets to know you. This will be at will and may not be next week or even next month, but it’s inevitable.

[ii] 

In perspective, finding a woman that a ‘man’ actually wants is a scary proposition. Let’s take a look at just a few items…According to Buzzle.com, one dating expert named Michael Douglas addresses what women look for in men; one thing he mentions that is still echoing in my head is under a category entitled ‘What turns on women’. He states “Again, since wealth and status are also big turn-ons for women, this means that the offspring of such unions will have money invested in them and their chances of surviving and reproducing are very good”.

What bothers me here is the audacity of women to equate love with the major undercurrent of money. ‘No money, No love’!, and the two are irrelevant to each other in nature.

   Traditionally, a man would approach a woman he may desire to meet and get to know with great confidence expecting a certain degree of success. That was before ‘The List’ got so long and the requirements were shuttled into deep space never to have been heard from again.

The reality of things are that love does not exist in the purest sense as perceived by society. It exists as an entity relient on other tangibles that create a scenario of what may appear as love but is only a moment of gratification that leads someone to believe that there is more to a relationship than that top-level executive position or Victorian-style 5 bedroom house in the ‘burbs’.

   In simpler terms, love is not a self-propelled engine, it’s more of series of events that need coordinated to determine whether there is compatibility with a man for women. Back to ‘The List’…this thing has more identities than a secret agent. One will list money as the number one qualifier, another, says purpose. The common denominator with all of them is length. From being healthy, strong and protective to persistence, confidence, prestige and great sense of humor, there seems to be no end to what women seek in men. These are just a few and already I am short of breath.

Another relationship expert, Audrey Valeriani in an article on ‘Women’s Web’ talks about red flags in a relationship in an article entitled, ‘Relationships’. She goes on to mention these things called ‘Negotiables and Non-Negotiables’. (There’s more?… You must be kidding me)!

Not at all, there is in fact more. She goes on to say, “ You’re in a new relationship, and you’re starting to see some red flags, warning you that the relationship may not be a good bet, but does that mean that you should leave? How do you know if the red flags mean future disaster, or are just a warning? And now you can begin to get clear about staying or leaving by looking at your negotiables and non-negotiables.” What is this? Why are there so many complications and formalities to dating women? I’ll tell you why. It all hinges on ‘The List”! This is not a mere list of qualities that women find attractive in men, it’s a list of marriage requirements.

   Too many deviations from ‘The List’ and you’ll be out on your ear before you can ask, “Will you marry me?”


[i] The Switch/WWWFM/What women want from men2008

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2 Responses to “Perspective from the Temple of Aphrodite”

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